Archives for posts with tag: happiness

When you knew someone had a crush on someone in grade school, the surest way to make them blush was to chant this at them…

Joe and Sally sittin’ in a tree, 

K. i. s. s. i. n. g.

First comes love,

Then comes marriage,

Then comes Sally with a baby carriage.

How quaint is that?  I remembered this while reading of yet another celebrity getting married after having a child or two with the love of his or her life.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m not being judgmental.  This was just a flashback to another time when there was such a thing as a scandal in town that would set the gossips aflutter.  I’m all about people finding happiness and someone to share their life with, no matter what order they do it in.

There are still gossips and there are still things that make us roll our eyes, but I can speak for most of my friends and say that we’re happy when our children are happy.  I don’t know any one of my friends who has rejected a grandchild because the parents weren’t married or a child is gay or quit speaking to a child for doing something outrageous.  Mostly, we love our children and grandchildren even when we wish they had done something  differently.  We still want to protect them from hurt.

Yes, there are those who judge harshly and publicly and there are those who wag their tongues, but the friends I hold dearest are those who share the good and the bad about our loved ones, laughing at the fact that even now, when we think we’ve seen it all, there are new dramas to face.  We lean on each other…a lot.

The truth is that life is never easy and we don’t know what the next day will bring and we learn to deal with it, no matter how hard it is. There are people in the world who never know a minute of happiness and then there are those who are given a lifetime of happiness, mixed with sorrow and trials and tribulations.  The happiest of marriages have a dip in the road here and there, illnesses strike from nowhere, death interrupts.  There are people who are lonely forever, those who wouldn’t know happiness if they were in the middle of it, and those who seem trapped under a black cloud their entire lives.  There are lives of poverty, lives of illness, lives of fear.

If you find happiness, grab it.  Who knows about tomorrow…OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

 

 

 

This is the time of year when we are rushing around creating the perfect holiday for our family and friends and we are reminded to count our blessings.  It’s a ritual while we worship and welcome the new year that we look over our life and reassess what we have and what is missing, what we want and what we need.  It’s a beautiful time of year…sometimes.

We help others who are not so fortunate so that our hearts won’t break at the irony of all we have when they have so little.  We look kindly towards those we may not notice the rest of the year.  We vow to look at the world this way all the time.  And, we do try.

This has not been the most holiday like time in our family.  In the last week, I had surgery (nothing horrible), my daughter-in-law’s mother died and there were horrible stories of a mass school shooting in the middle of it all.  But the strength of family, of people, prevails and we go on.  I’m a little surprised when people comment on how much our family has had to endure through the years, specifically meaning the loss of my husband and son to cancer.  Friends comment on our strength.  I don’t think we are any different from other families as we all have things going on with our core that may not be as visible as our losses.  The main thing is that we keep going…but don’t most people?  It’s hard to stop life coming at you.  We’ll have a wonderful Christmas together, laughing at memories of those who aren’t with us, and hugging each other as we make new ones.  Each year has its own story that becomes part of our history.

What keeps me going is a knowledge, learned through loss, that we don’t know how much time we have on earth, so we need to use it to create new memories, happy ones, when we can.  Those are our strength.  When Alan died, a minister told me I was greedy.  He said it in a kindly way, but I was a little taken aback.  I’ve absorbed it and understand he was right.  I have so much and want it to always be the same, but that’s just not the way life works.  The gift that I treasure most now is happiness.  I’ve learned that I have an abundance, an endless supply, in my life.  I understand the value of this blessing as I look around the world and understand that some people never experience a single minute of happiness in their entire life.  How can I not be grateful with all I have been given?  I am blessed beyond belief.

We all move from day to day, not really knowing what each moment will bring.  I hope that in these moments you receive happiness, true happiness, to add to your supply.