Archives for posts with tag: wedding

Today is my nephew’s wedding to a beautiful girl, an event they have been planning for months, down to the last detail. A dream wedding. Then life and nature stepped in. There was a snow/ice storm in Oklahoma that came up from Dallas, where the wedding is being held. Dallas was iced in, planes cancelled, power out. That means some guests, including my family and me, were unable to drive or fly in.

After years of party planning for my family, as a volunteer and then as a paid event planner, I’m used to these kinds of things. I have to say that my own wedding was in the middle of a blizzard/ice storm back in 1966. We were waiting at the church as my husband-to-be slid by. I told the minister not to worry, that he would get there. He did and I was too naive back then to worry about it. My mother had handled everything and I just wanted to get married. The details – and the worries – were hers. And everything went fine. People really are flexible.

I’ve planned many a party or event that got rained or snowed out. There was a tornado warning the day of one of my daughter’s wedding and we sat huddled in the basement that day. It doesn’t matter how carefully you plan because there is always that unknown factor and sometimes there is just no way to have a Plan B.

So, today, I’m sending much love to the bride and groom and hoping they are doing ok because I know this has been crazy. We all know they will be able to look back on this craziness and have the stories to tell. But, today, I’m sending them wishes for calmness. They will be beautiful and the wedding will go on and they will start their life together having weathered their first storm. It’s all about the marriage anyway.

I’m raising my mug of hot tea to the happy couple and toasting them with much love and many good wishes. It’s your day, Lisa and Kevin, and we can’t wait to see the pictures and hear the stories!

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I wonder who came up with the traditional wedding vows?  Those are pretty serious promises.  When you’re young, as I was 46 years ago today when I said mine, they make you feel pretty grown up to be saying serious things to someone you love.  We meant them with all our hearts and understood them as best we could at 21 years of age.  We abstractly understood that richer or poorer, sickness and health, until death do us part could happen to us, the last two probably when we were old and gray.  In the meantime, we would have a family and grow old together.

What happened to us was a marriage…as opposed to a wedding.  Weddings are where you are surrounded by friends and family wishing you well, parties, presents, and serious, we thought, conversations about the future.  Marriages are the reality of that future.  We had a good one for 31 years, ups and downs and all.  I learned from watching my grandparents and parents and their friends that long marriages aren’t always achieved while traveling a smooth road.  There are challenges in the very best of marriages, some caused by people within them, some caused by the world around us.  My paternal grandparents were married over 50 years, but they lost a son in the war.  My maternal grandmother was widowed at 29 and left with three children in the depression.  My parents were married over 50 years and were very much in love.  Was it always easy?  Not at all, but they worked at it.

My marriage was great fun, passionate in all ways.  We made each other laugh, we adored our children, we worked hard.  It was a lot of work…a lot…to raise four children.  We really succeeded at that.  But we had to deal with all those pesky vows.  We never wavered in those promises…richer or poorer, sickness and health, ’til death do us part.  We didn’t expect to have to deal with all of them and we didn’t expect it to end so early.  I never thought I’d be a widow at 52.  Wow.

But, today, December 23, I pay tribute to those kids that we were who never quit trying.  It was quite an adventure with that special guy.  Knowing what I know now, would I go back and do it again?  You bet!  I’d say “I Do!” without batting an eye.  What an amazing life we had together.  We packed a lot of living and a lot of loving into the time we had.  And, that adventure led to my next one and my next one and I keep heading to the next one.  Yes, I do.

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